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Nov. 3rd, 2009

:D

Posted at 11:37 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

My favorite fictional couple <3

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Jul. 31st, 2009

Old Fashioned. Pt.1


I am very old fashioned when it comes to being a woman. I can cook and clean. I have yet to learn how to sew. And I would like to learn how to. When I get older I hope to be a house mom and complete all these tasks. Maybe even have a garden. Philip the Morning Glory is the first plant to survive more than 2 weeks. And I am very proud of that. I have no idea were I learned how to be an old fashioned woman. I congratulate the women in the past for giving us women the right to vote and to equal and to work. Hahaa, I would just like to stay at home, raise the kids, and do daily chores. I have no idea why. I'm 16 years old. That may change but I hope the future is the way I hope it plans out.
I know I will be married in 2 years, and I am very happy about that.

Posted at 03:41 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jun. 26th, 2009

Fact or Fiction


I am a very complex individual and it is very hard to determine what I am thinking in any sort of situation. Also, I tend to be confusing because I cannot keep my ideas/thoughts in order and come out wrong in some form or another.


It is very frustrating only because I occasionally sound STUPID in a bad situation.


I've become highly interested in photography but I don't seem to have the proper materials and/or the high level of skill to accomplish any idea that comes into mind. It is very saddening because I have very many, MANY ideas that I would like to see done. And I know if I did them, they would come out nicely.


Too bad I don't have anything...

Posted at 08:20 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jun. 11th, 2009

(no subject)


Fuck.


School is out tomorrow.


And yet I feel as if I hardly accomplished anything.


Need to start working out, especially if I want to make varsity for Field Hockey.

If I don't make it, then I'm going to feel like a dip-shit and I would want to quit but my parents said that I can only have a cell phone if I play a sport.

Which I think is the dumbest piece of bullshit ever told/heard


At least I make my one and only Alex happers.

Meow. I love you.

Posted at 04:17 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Dec. 16th, 2008

Again, Again, Again

I love you. I want to be with you forever. And that is exactly how it will be my love.
Alex.....



</param>

Posted at 04:32 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Oct. 5th, 2008

Agreed.

mood: loved


I wouldn't be surprised at all if you created a livejournal account. I kinda expect you too anyways. It's alright if you don't though.
You know who you are.

Damn. October 4th.

I don't think today could have been better. I hope I get more days like this in my memories. I'm all about memories if you couldn't tell already. I blame Advent Children and it's subliminal messages. Who cares though. :)

I love you. No matter what you think I would never leave you. I'm always here for you.
And my window is always open but I would rather not have you walk here. It would be different if you lived closer but you live all the way by the infamous GPK.

I don't think I can say much more. Okay I could, but would you honestly want to read an online novel?

I have so much on my mind and heart that it would take forever.

Just know. I love you :)

[edited @ 1:26 am]

I should kill myself the next time I mention Twilight. But this is the only thing that I could ever compare too.
Here it goes:

"Don't be afraid," I murmured. "We belong together.
I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it.
His arms wrapped around mine, holding me against him, summer and winter. It felt like every nerve ending in my body was a live wire.
"Forever," he agreed.


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Posted at 12:27 am | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Aug. 28th, 2008

CAT 6 Failure

mood: crushed
music: Things Will Change (Kangding Ray Remix) by Modwheelmood

Alright, so apparently I'm dumber that I thought I was. In fact, like trying not to sound vain or anything, but I'm really smart. Everyone asks me for help. So, I get my test scores from the state this morning, and the minute I open them I'm like "WTF!". I'm actually surprised at myself that I didn't start crying. Well, the English portion is where it should be, but I could have done a tiny bit better. 399 Advanced. I'm aiming for 410 this year. Now the math portion. When it comes down to math, I'm a lost cause but I always manage getting Proficient on the test. I was in Algebra 1 this year. And I see that section "300 Basic" OH HELL NO THAT'S ALMOST BELOW BASIC. I FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT RIGHT NOW. I'm really mad! This is the first year that I completely fail. I am really into my education, as you can tell.
So this is a complete disappointment and now I want to kill myself like the samurais did when they lost their honor.


I mean, there's like no real way of studying for this test, so WTF. I despise you California.


I have some other things to say, but I will make this one short. I might post later within the day.


I hate field hockey right now. I want to quit.
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Posted at 11:10 am | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Aug. 8th, 2008

Writer's Block: Your Topic

Is there a topic you can't stop writing about in your journal? Why do you write about it so much?

Submitted By [info]beach_baby3000


View 501 Answers


I am quite surprised that my obession with Tom Delonge has not reached my LJ
Otherwise, I would have written a novel by now.
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Posted at 03:10 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Eclipse 195


"Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love."

You know I should leave it at that.
But I won't. Because that would be really short.

Just now, thinking of someone
Made me want to post an entry.
Yet, there are so many things I want to put down,
I am not even sure that I could.
I type pretty fast but not fast enough.
My mind is full of things. I wrote a poem last night.

It's kinda about abandonment? You could call it that.
Abandonment....
But it's on the other laptop and I really don't feel like getting it.

I could type it all on my cell, but even with a keyboard
It's still hard.

I rant too much...
Sooner or later, hopefully sooner
I will actually take the time and write something meaningful
Until then.....

I just tried to translate something I wrote in Japanese.
But since the crash of this laptop, all I see is boxes.
I wrote something meaningful, and yet when I translate it back to English
It makes no sense.

I wish I knew Japanese better.

OH YES I REMEMBERED SOMETHING!

I've been keeping a food journal starting the beginning of August.
And a little goal book thing.
I've been struggling with my weight since I was four.
It was so easy for my sisters because they were so thin, and I get stuck with the fat gene.
I want to lose 15 pounds all together, and so far I've lost 5.

It's really hard. That's one of the reasons why I don't like myself.

And my relatives from Canada left this morning. I cried last night because I was going to miss them, even if we aren't close. I didn't feel lonely, especially with their 4 & 6 year old daughters.
I loved them ; 3;

Haha, I want kids when I grow up. I know this one for sure.

I'm going to eat leftover chinese food for breakfast. Haha
That's honestly how lame I am.

//END RANT
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Posted at 10:10 am | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jul. 28th, 2008

Another one & Comic Con

" Why do I fill my mind with illogical thoughts
To aspire of something immaterial?
I see things that cannot be, will not be.
These thoughts of aspiration, of hope.
Why do I feel that I am eternally waiting?
For something of which I cannot perceive.
Of which I do not know.

To think i trusted you
Let you walk all over me
Shower me with words of hate
Although those words are painful I don't let them get to my head
For one day I will make it Far above where you end up
Then you will wonder
What you could have done
To make me feel welcome
Now that I am confident

You are a coward in fear
For one day I will outsmart you
Causing you to tear
I don't want to beat you
For then you will get mad
You leave me no choice when you say those hateful words
Calling me those names
The thing you don't know Is
I will succeed "


He honestly does it again for me. His words are so full of meaning, it's unbelievable.

And as for Comic Con. I had a good time. I took no pictures, only some, but not as much as I wanted to take. I guess, itstead of having some camera capture the memories, I wanted my heart to take those pictures.
I wish I wasn't so shy. I sound selfish saying that I don't want you to leave me, even if we aren't going out.

I suck and I can't explain much.

Posted at 12:28 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jul. 22nd, 2008

Impressed

" To talk about me
And my feelings
But I'm afraid I don't know how
Because I can only seem to show
Contradicting pieces
Never the whole
Because I don't know it myself

You want me to explain myself
Tell you what's going on
When I don't even know

I'm kind of lost
Not to mention scared out of my mind
To be left with myself
And look inside
And see myself
Who I really am
Not who I pretend to be
With my overly loud laugh
And voice
Dressing up and smiling
For the people who will never care
Or notice

So I guess I'm a little beaten down
Downtrodden with disappointment
When no one looks my way
But I make my way along
Still smiling for those who need me

Or say they do
Because I can never trust
Motives or people,easily

It takes just about everything I've got

"Why?' you ask me
I can't tell you
Because I don't know myself "

This needs to be explained: These are not, I repeat, NOT my own words. I found them on someones profile. And without stating names, etc. I am crediting them for coming up with this. Because, honestly, reading that made me feel a whole lot better.
That is what I call: Impressive.
That is exactly how I feel at the moment, I have no idea why. Life seems to be insignificant; no I'm insignificant. The reasons are unknown, nothing wrong has happened. For once in my life, things are turning out to be better than expected. The guy I've liked for the past few months, likes me back. So, I ask myself, "What is wrong with me, there is nothing to be a crap head about"

I'm not sure at the moment. And I am being a crap head. Always am. Cannot help that about myself. And I'm easily amused. I am an idiot.

I cannot wait for Comic Con this Friday. So much could happen in one day.
I'm ready. 

Posted at 01:45 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jul. 14th, 2008

Haha :]


Haha, honestly. People nowadays have nothing better to do than to make other people feel like shit. And, people call other kids some pretty nasty shit just to make themselves feel better. So today, I get this truthbox crap saying "I'm a fucking bitch and I hate your guts". What was my immediate expression: HAHA. Wow, this person, and I have a pretty good clue to who it is, has no reason to hate me. We were down at the beginning of the school year, and all of a sudden, OMG WUT?! he starts to hate me? Coincidence anyone? I believe so. First of all, I have done nothing to deserve this type of childish behavior whatsoever. And for him to start doing all this shit? Haha, quite pathetic. All I ever done is be nice to this kid. I want to be his friend, honestly. Why? Because he is pretty rad and easy to talk to about anything. But when you start fucking with me: I don't let that slide. You better be in for it, because I take in no one's shit. Not only are you playing with fire, you're soaking those damn matches in gasoline.

Why won't some kids grow up? I have. Yah, I may have my moments but when it comes down to what I want, I'm pretty serious. I know the right moments.

These past few weeks have been awesome/crazy. With me confessing and having those feelings returned, to going to my friend's house and stuffing foil into our mouths for grills.

I absolutely love summer right now. I do wish I could see everyone everyday like we used to though.

And Comic Con. Don't even get me started with that. I'm going to do so many things just that one day, I will blow all your minds.

Lesson Learned Today: Don't fuck with Cynthia or I keelz yo. 


Posted at 02:55 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Jul. 2nd, 2008

The Place with the Stuff & Things

Summer is supposed to be a blast for me. But no. I try to make the best of it, but when I have no self-esteem in me to do anything at all it's really hard. Today I learned that shyness, is a freaking disorder. No wonder I'm a hermit. I don't like going anywhere because I become easily embarrassed by every little thing. It's impossible for me to do anything that I want to do. I don't even like going to the mall! The only one I like is Plaza Chula Vista only because I can avoid anyone I know or see at school.
I want to shoot myself because I can't get over crap like that.
I want to hang out with all my friends and I don't want to be fat anymore. I can't even go to the gym because there is too many people around.
So pretty much my entire summer is going to be fucked. The only thing I actually look forward to is Comic Con. I have no idea why I can stand so many people there. Maybe because they most likely are into the same things that I'm into.
Kevin Periera <3 

Posted at 01:50 pm | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

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